6034 West Courtyard Drive, Suite 100, Austin, TX 78730
Call Us Today
512-610-6199
Recent Blog Posts
Psychological Tasks to Keep Your Marriage Healthy
Keeping your marriage healthy in order to avoid filing for divorce may depend on both parties in the couple completing some simple psychological exercises. As we head into the New Year, many couples will be making resolutions to work on themselves and their marriages; keeping these few simple thoughts in mind may help save your marriage.
According to the American Psychological Association (APA), nearly 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce. Couples who spend some time focusing on the following five psychological tasks set forth by the APA, however, stand a better chance of beating the odds. In order to help make a marriage work, couples should:
- Establish a new identity as a couple that is separate, though not estranged from, the families they grew up in;
- Establish boundaries that protect their individuality while still working on building a sense of intimacy and togetherness;
New Study Links Divorce to Spouse's Alcohol Consumption Habits
A recent study, conducted by the Buffalo Research Institute on Addictions (RIA), has linked the differences in a spouse's alcohol consumption habits to divorce. Kenneth Leonard, Ph.D., RIA director and lead author of the study stated,"Our results indicate that it is the difference between the couple's drinking habits, rather than the drinking itself, that leads to marital dissatisfaction, separation and divorce."
Researchers followed 634 couples over the first nine years of their marriage and found that close to 50 percent of couples "where only one partner drank more heavily" would end up divorcing, while the divorce rates for other couples was only 30 percent. The study also found that the divorce rate remained the same for couples where both partners consumed large amounts of alcohol, showing that they were just as likely to stay together as couples who were not heavy drinkers or drinkers at all. "This research provides solid evidence to bolster the commonplace notion that heavy drinking by one partner can lead to divorce. Although some people might think that's a likely outcome, there was surprisingly little data to back up that claim until now," stated Leonard.
Who Can Get a Protective Order in Texas?
Sadly, although the winter season might be associated with New Year joy, for victims of domestic violence, the winter can be the most difficult part of the year. Domestic violence shelters report that they see more clients during the winter.
The long winter months, especially when combined with increased financial pressures or the loss of a job, can add extra stress to a situation where domestic violence is already an issue. If you are a victim of domestic violence, you may be able to use a protective order as part of your overall safety plan. To learn more about your options, you should consult with a family law attorney.
You can get a protective order in Texas if you are a victim of family violence, dating violence, stalking, or sexual assault. The applicant for an order has to go to court to demonstrate that family violence has occurred and that more family violence is likely to occur in the future. This can be a scary prospect for a current victim of violence, which is why having a knowledge attorney at your disposal can make the process easier.
The Process of Petitioning for Divorce in Texas
Deciding to file for divorce can be arduous and stressful. Occasionally that is because the filer is not aware of how the process works. First, when the decision is made to initiate a divorce, there are certain requirements that need to be met. For example, there are residency requirements in Texas. Either spouse must live in the state for at least six months before filing. Also, either spouse must have lived in the county where the suit is filed for the past 90 days.
After meeting with an attorney and discussing the divorce, that attorney will file an Original Petition for Divorce with the District Clerk of your county. The spouse who initiates the divorce proceedings is called the petitioner and the other spouse is called the respondent. The petition will list the grounds for divorce, children from the marriage, any protective orders existing against either spouse as well as a list of separate property not to be considered in the division of marital property.
Learning from Relationship Mistakes of Divorcees
Throughout life, people make mistakes. Occasionally, these mistakes are small and forgotten as soon as they are committed. Other mistakes have long lasting effects and are difficult to move past. Divorce can occasionally cause regrets but it is important to learn from mistakes and try not to make them again.
According to data compiled by Dr. Terri Orbuch, most divorced people cite common regrets from their relationships. The longitudinal study followed over 350 couples who were between 25 and 37 years old. Over 25 years, 46 percent of the couples divorced, and of those Orbuch asked them about the errors they made in their relationships. Mistakes that they realized were contributing factors to their divorce. Dr. Orbuch hoped to use her research as a teaching tool to help others in their marriages.
Fifteen percent of the divorcees responded that they should have given their spouses more positive attention. A kiss, a compliment and other kinds of affection can increase a spouse's mood and strengthen a marriage. Not letting your spouse know that you support them emotionally can have far reaching consequences. Once the feeling of love is gone, then the relationship might be next.
Having a Happy Holiday Season after a Divorce
The first holidays following a divorce can be a very difficult time for everyone. Families are forced to deal with visitation schedules, vacation, gift-giving and other issues that they have never had to deal with before. If this is your first holiday season following a divorce, there are several things you should consider doing to make your holidays flow more smoothly.
Create a Holiday Schedule
If you did not create a holiday schedule in your divorce settlement or custody agreement, make one ahead of time. Discuss plans with your ex-spouse calmly and reasonably, and be willing to give a bit. Remember, it should be about making your children happy, and try to resolve things as easily as possible.
Unemployment and Divorce
There are many factors that contribute to divorce, and more and more studies are being released as of late that point to non-traditional reasons for marital dissolution. One such study, as reported by the Huffington Post, examines martial satisfaction and employment status. "The examination found that when men are not employed, it heightens the possibility of either the man or woman leaving the marriage." The study did not report similar findings if it was the wife that was unemployed or laid off instead of the husband. With effects of the Great Recession still rippling through American society, this study would indicate that many marriages have come to an end because of unemployment or job loss.
The unemployment rate, according to data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics, is dramatically higher today than it was a decade ago. In January 2003, for example, the unemployment rate was 5.8, a typical number for months that year. In 2013, on the other hand, the unemployment rate was 7.9. This was down from the height of the Great Recession, when the January 2010 unemployment rate clocked in at 9.8, nearly a ten-year high (the unemployment rate was the highest its been this decade in March and April of 2010, at 9.9 percent). According to the Census Bureau, however, the divorce rate actually declined from 1990 to 2009; from 4.7 per 1,000 people to 3.4. This was the most recent year for which this data was available.
Divorce and How it Affects Men's Health
Divorce is rarely described as easy. Despite the frequency of divorce, the impact of divorce is often significant. And it seems to be particularly difficult for men. An article in the Journal Of Men's Health, a peer-reviewed publication that addresses the disparity in life expectancy between men and women, discusses how divorce affects men's psychological, biological, social, and spiritual health.
Psychological Health
From a psychological and behavioral standpoint, unmarried men are more prone to depression, anxiety and substance abuse. Men who divorce have lower levels of happiness and self-acceptance. In fact, the article states that divorced or separated men are ten times more likely to undergo psychiatric care than married men.
Biological Health
Studies have found that married men live longer than unmarried men. The increased mortality rates in unmarried men are attributed to a wide variety of causes, including cardiovascular disease, hypertension, stroke, pneumonia and suicide. Married men have better health habits, better records of medical compliance, and more frequent monitoring of health status, all of which could positively affect mortality rates.
Reasons Why Married Couples Split
Marriage requires upkeep. Romance, intimacy, and communication are three things that can become more difficult as time passes. Issues and arguments will come up in every marriage. However, in some cases, you and your spouse may decide that divorce is the best option for you.
One cause of divorce is infidelity. The bonds of love and trust are often irrevocably damaged when cheating occurs. In Texas, if you choose to file a fault based divorce, infidelity can affect things such as property division and alimony during your divorce settlement.
Another possible cause of divorce is physical or emotional abuse. It can be harder to split from someone who exerts their power with cruelty. No one should excuse this kind of behavior and the abused spouse should seek to safely separate from the abusive spouse. An order of protection or a restraining order can be helpful in this situation.
Open Adoption Can Be Positive for Your Child Down the Road
Adding a child to your family is a very exciting prospect, but it is also a process that can feel confusing and emotionally overwhelming if it is your first time. One way to ease your anxiety is to work with a family lawyer experienced in adoption. This will give you more information about what to expect and how to structure the adoption in a way that is best for you and the child.
The Minnesota/Texas Adoption research project explored two waves of children who were adopted. In their first wave of research, the project creators found no relationship between adoption openness and self-esteem, but those results changed as time went on, possibly reflecting a greater trend about the desire for open adoption.
The first wave of research worked with adopted children between the ages of 4 and 12, and the second wave worked with children between 11 and 21 years old. For older adopted children, there is a positive aspect of having an open adoption: those teens who had birth mother contact were the most satisfied of all research groups with their level of birth parent contact overall. Most of the adolescents wanted more contract with their birth parents in the future, too.
Contact Us Today
Set up a consultation by filling out the form below:
The use of the Internet or this form for communication with the firm or any individual member of the firm does not establish an attorney-client relationship. Confidential or time-sensitive information should not be sent through this form.
I have read and understand the Disclaimer and Privacy Policy.
